Let our Yes be Yes & our No be No- Responsibility and Calling
/Many of us have had a lot more alone time during this pandemic than we’ve ever experienced in our lifetime. I’ve chosen to see the silver linings that can happen in these challenging circumstances when so much is out of our control. I have had friends say too how this has been their own personal reset of some sort to reprioritize their lives and try and get off the rat race where possible. For myself as well, I have appreciated more time to process what I am called to and what I am not called to. We have been given one life to live on this earth- it is good and right to press into God’s voice to lead us in the right direction for our lives. Earlier this year, I was asked to write an article for the Well Collaborative, on a theme and I titled it “Responsibility and Calling” It begins with these words:
“What do we say yes to and what do we say no to?
Every day we are faced with the question: What is my responsibility? We face wrestling matches of our souls each and every day. There are endless emotional responses to daily living, relational challenges and expectations let alone the pressures of our vocation, needs of our community, and more broadly, global affairs that are simply out of our control. Does anyone want to just scream some days knowing that this pandemic has been shaking us up for over a year now? Like it or not, we are faced with choices each day as to how to react.
“Let your yes be yes, and let your no be no”.
This spiritual truth has been a testing ground for my soul as to where I spend my time, what to do, who to serve or share my life with.” (Click the link to continue reading the entire article from February 2021).
Burnout & Boundaries
If you are like me, you have a TON of passion- OR passionate about many things, we have to hone in on what our specific calling is for this season in life. In my article for The Well, I talked about some of the fallouts with unbridled passion, especially in service to others. Some face burnout when we don’t have healthy boundaries as I mentioned “over caring”, and “over responsibility”. In the article for the Well, I shared the importance of boundaries and quoted leaders I respect in this area on the topic, Dr. Caroline Leaf and Dr. Henry Cloud. It’s never too late to learn. The Bible has much to say on Godly decisiveness, boundaries, assertiveness, and the power of our thoughts and actions to avoid being “Double Minded”.
Let your “Yes be Yes” and our “No be No”
I alluded to a scripture verse in that article where Jesus wants us to know when to say a full-on “YES”, and when to say “NO”. This is following His famous “Sermon on the mount’ where He teaches on how to live in God’s kingdom. After he shared about the blessings for addressing spiritual poverty, waiting on the Lord, gentleness, craving righteousness, demonstrating mercy, purity of heart, making peace, being persecuted, living as ‘salt and light'“, Jesus taught on issues like anger, adultery, loving our enemies, and making oaths or vows as recorded in Matthew Chapter 5
“Again, your ancestors were taught, ‘Never swear an oath that you don’t intend to keep, but keep your vows to the Lord God.’ However, I say to you, don’t bind yourself by taking an oath at all. Don’t swear by heaven, for heaven is where God’s throne is placed. Don’t swear an oath by the earth, because it is the rug under God’s feet, and not by Jerusalem, because it is the city of the Great King. And why would you swear by your own head, because it’s not in your power to turn a single hair white or black? But just let your words ring true. A simple ‘Yes’ or ‘No’ will suffice. Anything beyond this springs from a deceiver.” Mathew 5: 33-37
and then Jesus goes on to speak more on Kingdom living:
“Your ancestors have also been taught, ‘Take an eye in exchange for an eye and a tooth in exchange for a tooth.’ However, I say to you, don’t repay an evil act with another evil act. But whoever insults you by slapping you on the right cheek, turn the other to him as well. If someone is determined to sue you for your coat, give him the shirt off your back as a gift in return. And should people in authority take advantage of you, do more than what they demand. Learn to generously share what you have with those who ask for help, and don’t close your heart to the one who comes to borrow from you.” Mathew 5: 38-42
YES to Boundless Grace
It is simply amazing to know and understand that my calling involves every part of my journey- the highs, the lows, the trials, bumps, and painful lessons learned along my journey. Our lack of boundaries (or too tight of ones), gives us room to reach out to the One who has boundless grace.
Grace is made possible with all who Jesus is and what He offers us as we put our trust, and faith in Him. My responsibility is, to be truthful with God, self, and others and embrace grace by saying YES to all that I’m meant to receive. When I do, He takes my messes and turns them into a message. He turns tests into a testimony. Peace prevails and my calling is more clear. The Well article ended with this:
“Each task or responsibility beckons us to ask ourselves if we need to tighten our boundaries and say a clear “no”, or widen our boundaries and say a full-on “yes”. When we do, our calling is sharpened and our responsibilities become more evident. When we make peace with our pathway, we can hear that still small voice within calling us to that unique journey crafted just for us- doing nothing more, nothing less.”- Jodi Kozan
Further Supportive Resources:
“Responsibility and Calling”- Blog post-Feb 15h 2021 written for The Well Collaborative
Matthew 15 Bible Project Overview Videos, podcast, blogs
Got Questions- “What does it mean to let your yes be yes and your no be no” blog