Learning to Lament
/“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.”
What Does It Mean to Lament?
Lament has been a spiritual discipline that has often been misunderstood or avoided altogether by many. Jesus said “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted” among other profound promises found in the Beatitudes on his famous Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 5.
I used to think mourning was a topic reserved only for those who are experiencing the death of a loved one. As a young girl, I didn’t understand when hearing the words of Jesus saying we’d be ‘blessed’ if we mourn? It just didn’t make sense to me. I reminder thinking “How in the world would anyone feel a blessing by something so dark and awful- Like death sucks! “ I just didn’t get it. But as I grew older, I experienced more of life which has included grieving the loss of people from this earth and the loss of many other things. I get it, I’m getting it. I’ve mourned relationships gone awry or severed altogether, transitions in life I wasn’t ready for, dreams dashed, vision hindered, health challenges, bearing burdens of grief in others, etc, etc. Through my own spiritual journey, I have been embracing the call to mourn, grieve,. . . lament. In doing so, I’ve allowed myself to embrace the first and second commandments more and make space for growth. As such, I want to inspire others in their journey to restoration to follow suit. We are carrying far too much that we were never meant to carry.
Lament is a Gift
Below is an interview where I ask my dear friend in ministry Karen L. Block to explain Lament, but also share ways in which she helps others in this. She has reminded me this past year that lament is a gift. As a spiritual director - facilitator - artist, and linguist turned soul care provider, she has much to share on this topic. Click “Play” to watch the 11-minute video:
“. . . Teach your daughters how to wail; teach one another a lament.”
How Does This Relate to Us Currently?
Across the globe, this pandemic is bringing a plethora of emotions to the surface and many simply don’t know what to do with them. There aren’t enough online counselors, spiritual directors, pastors, coaches to help calm the raging storms that are within. Some people are in a state of shock, paralyzed by worry, panic, fear, or simply feeling boredom, or greater loneliness, sadness- especially when our isolation is keeping us from gathering in groups for Passover, Holy Week or Easter weekend with loved ones as we are used to.
As much as we are trying to comply with Governmental/ Health regulations amidst the fear of the unknown, we are frustrated. We wouldn’t be human if we weren’t in some way shape or form. At the same time, most haven’t realized that humanity is experiencing grief in many ways during this time of what we have lost or are about to lose. It’s easy to measure the devastating effects that COVID 19 has played on our economy and other sectors of society, but perhaps we haven’t recognized the full effects that this has had on our soul. If we can experience some sort of “blessing “ when we mourn, let’s all find ways in which we can express our grief in a healthy way to find release.
A friend of mine recently wrote and recorded the song "COVID 19 Lament" as he posted a video recording off of his phone to Facebook. When I saw the post, I immediately reached out to him and ask about his inspiration in producing this as this topic of "lament" was in my head for months now.
Below is my 15-minute interview with Kelly B. Wiens on April 8th, 2020 along with one version of "Where Will It End: A COVID-19 Lament"* (words and music Kelly B. Wiens April 4, 2020.
*Disclaimer- There are a few errors in this video, I know. One big one is when I refer to Kelly's song title wrong 3 times! It's supposed to be "Where will it end? Not "When will it end? Oh well:) It was an off the cuff interview and my first time doing a taped interview with zoom:) Regardless, I pray this conversation encourages you in some way.
Good Friday
As I set to publish this post on Good Friday, 2020, I know millions of people are googling “What’s so ‘good’ about Friday”? There are a ton of phenomenal services available online today and throughout the weekend to grow in our faith during this time (and some wonky ones too), so rather than being overwhelmed with which ones are good, which articles to read, what movies to watch, which faith leader to listen to, what’s most important is to live your life to an audience of “One”. If you can’t feel God’s presence right now, know who Jesus is, or sense the presence of His Holy Spirit, at this time, a perfect place to start is to lament. Our Creator desires to make His home in your heart to bring you the peace that passes all understanding during this time.
Create a Lament
We may not all be worship leaders who can whip out a song of lament as Kelly did, but we can create a lament by shouting, singing, meditating, through movement, art or writing out a prayer of lament as Karen mentioned during this time and always. It doesn’t matter what faith you belong to, the church you attend or affiliate with or not, God is waiting to hear our heart cries and longs to meet you in your place of grieving, mourning, lamenting. We can find comfort knowing that Jesus understands suffering well. As we grieve/ lament and allow the Spirit of the living God to speak to us. We can dare to hope amidst the challenges we face, and for that- we walk in the supernatural blessings of the unseen world.
“. . .You do not take delight in sickness or sorrow But You say blessed it the man whose delight is in You Who meditates on Your word every day So I will fix my eyes on the One who loves me I will fix my gaze on You in this night And I will soar on the wings of the wind of Your Spirit I will rest in You. I will rest in You. . .” (Kelly. B Wiens).
To download a “Lament format Exercise”, based on Micheal Card’s “A Sacred Sorrow”visit Karen L Block’s website @thecrossroads
“The thought of my suffering . . .is bitter beyond words. I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this:
The faithful love of the Lord never ends. His mercies never cease. Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning”
-Blog Post “Learning to Lament” written April 10th 2020 by Jodi Kozan
